Tales from the Table: Pein Assutt

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Getting to Altamura

After the snow, rain, sleet, construction, high street and low, we found ourselves approaching the glorious little town of Altamura in the comune of Apulia in the province of Bari. The sun had popped out and I made an awesome sighting of a group of wild boar (cingale) that barreled over a broken stone wall out of sight as we beetled past only minutes from town.

The rental

Our instructions were simple all we had to do was find Porto Bari, one of the ancient gates to the old city, park nearby and walk to our studio. Our digs for the night were excellent and beautifully renovated. Brimming with ambience, we were only steps from the very centre of the ancient walled town.

Italy’s finest

We were here for Italy’s finest bread. So fine in fact that it has garnered its own DOP and is shipped all over Italy under strict scrutiny. The following morning we would join Guiseppe at his bakery, Panificio Di Gesù, just outside the gates to see just what makes this bread so special.
The rain had followed us and since the snow storm had shortened our stay in Altamura by a day, we would have to slog it out to try and see some sights.

Centro Storico

Altamura is known for more than its DOP bread. It is also known for the Altamura Cathedral built in 1232 and is where the Altamura Man, a 130 000-year-old fossil of the genus Homo, was discovered in 1993.

The city centre or “Centro Storico” is small enough to conquer in a day and its maze-like streets winding between the circular walls hide all sorts of little bakeries and shops. The main thoroughfares are paved in a very well worn marble, which in the rain is as slippery as ice and the one thing we had plenty of that day was rain. The sun did make an effort and punctuated the day by peeking out and blinding us with the reflection from the wet marble streets.

Cheap Eats

Back in the cosy comfort of our flat we dried out and planned an early dinner so we could be bright eyed and bushy tailed for the next morning of bread baking. We had been tipped off by friends that there was a very local and inexpensive trattoria within walking distance from our location. With nothing else cued up and the rain still pelting down, it was decided it was our best bet.

Antica Hosteria Pein Assutt

We arrived at 8 pm to an empty restaurant and stink eyes from the wait staff. Antica Hosteria Pein Assutt is a small hole in the wall of the Centro Storico. The first thing you notice walking in is the graffiti absolutely covering every inch of wall. The staff is young and the vibe is as hip as Altamura Italy gets. We are seated in a small alcove that is festooned with more graffiti and signatures and has seating for four more. Alone at first, we waited patiently for the waiters and cooks to get their shit together while more people funnelled in.

Horse Meat

The food was cucina povera, inexpensive plates of tasty local goodies. Nobody was winning any awards for plating here but the food was solid, tasty and cheap. The speciality of the house was horse meat and it was served in various saucy preparations including a spicy tomato gravy and also a lemon sauce, which didn’t work with the bolder flavour of the meat. Again this is food you don’t really look at you just enjoy the scene and the honest cooking.

Four Quarters Make One Bottle

The night wore on and soon a very handsome couple quietly sat down at the table next to us for dinner at about 10:30. We had been drinking a nice house red by the 1/4 carafe and were wondering now why we just didn’t get a bottle. Quiet after finishing our last bite, the gentleman next to us asked, in broken English, how we liked the food. We gave our honest reply and he concurred. Living just upstairs they had come down for an antipasto and wine.

Bearded Luca and his lady friend Angie

Luca, a very interesting character with a full thick beard and his equally interesting girlfriend Angie asked us how we liked Altamura and what our plans were. After telling him of our great adventure through Italy he said: “wow man, you have probably seen more of Italy than any Italian.”

Mel Gibson

Slowly our seats turned towards each other’s tables as we engaged in a wonderful conversation in broken English and terrible Italian. Turns out that Luca had just finished working on a Mel Gibson film as an extra in nearby Matera and to say that he is a film buff would be an understatement as he regaled us with all his favourite movie lines in character.

Padre Pepe

Meanwhile, our tables had been cleared and the waiter slipped small plastic cups, in front of all of us. A stack of cups sat nestled in the top of a well-used green plastic watering can with a thin long spout. Deftly he poured each of us a generous shot of Padre Pepe, a digestif. We continued to sip and talk getting animated about the incredible diversity of accents in Italy which culminated in Luca demonstrating the different ways each region might say our favourite Italian catchphrase “Va bene”. Our waiter, like a ninja, slipped in multiple times during our ruckus conversation and hit our plastic cups with precision from afar spouting Padre Pepe from his plastic watering can.

 

Lubricated

Padre Pepe had lubricated our conversation and we had gotten lost in the fun when we realized we were the only ones left in the restaurant except for all the staff who were sitting at one table absolutely glaring at us. It was no wonder either because as we emerged from our private alcove we realized it was 2 am!

What Time Is It?

In disbelief, I quickly and apologetically handed my credit card to the waiter so we could pay and go. Unfortunately, it wouldn’t be that simple since his card machine would not work and we had all of 5 euros cash on us. It was a very awkward situation made stranger by the time and alcohol but was finally rectified by our new friends paying our bill.

Goodbye

Now huddled outside in the pouring rain under one umbrella, we all said our goodbyes as though we were old friends at a reunion. We slipped away into the empty, wet streets but not before Angie and Luca demanded we take their umbrella for the walk home.

So much for an early night! If we had one more drink we could have walked directly to the bakery to start making bread since in just a few hours we would be there learning about Altamura famous DOP bread.
To be continued…